by Gemma Newton
Image credit: PeacefulPirateNinja
Laying among sunshine and newspapers,
the city bustles around the park’s edge.
I am convinced those around me are faultless, fearless,
my own confidence balanced on a precarious ledge.
Why does my hair not float like hers
or my smile shine so brightly?
Perfect people glide by on perfumed air
and I hide further into the grass, unsightly.
Clasped hands, I pray to the sun,
why does she shine less on me?
She flickers and winks through the lingering clouds,
her rays stroke my skin, tenderly.
“Look a little closer,” she whispers,
“it is not me but you that sees wrong.
Behind those sunglasses that glistening girl
is as fearful as you to belong.
She may seem perfect with my light on her face
but can you not see those tiny cracks?
She is as troubled and self-conscious as you,
everyday placing her own head under her own self-loathing axe.”
For a brief moment the girl glances at me
and she begs the sun to instead shine on her.
She sees beauty in me but not herself —
we are each our own worst saboteur.
Judgement and jealousy are abundant in our world,
but confidence in our own beauty finite.
So I look to the sun and ask one last thing:
can she make all of us shine equally bright?
Gemma Newton
Gemma is a freelance writer and nutritionist. After experiencing anxiety first-hand, she became interested in fitness and wellbeing, studying nutritional therapy to better understand the link between food and mental health. She lives in the Berkshire countryside with her husband and cat.
PeacefulPirateNinja
Remi Jokiranta, aka PeacefulPirateNinja, is a 20-year-old psychology student from Finland currently studying in Edinburgh. They are very passionate about human rights (especially women’s and LGBTQIA+ rights) and animal rights and they advocate for these causes in many different ways (street activism, social media, art, etc.). They love to draw, paint and write poems. They’re also very passionate about self-love, addressing mental health issues and being inclusive to everyone.
